Tag Archive | Daniella Blechner

Mr Wrong in The Voice

I was lucky to have a stint in The Voice Paper. Here it is!

How To Find Mr Right And Say Goodbye To Mr Wrong

LOVE LESSONS: Daniella Blechner

THEY SAY a problem shared is a problem halved, and this old adage has proved particularly lucrative for self-published author, Daniella Blechner.

Using a collection of memoirs from a number of scorned women (and some men) from around the world, Blechner put together Mr Wrong: Learn From Mr Wrong and Claim Mr Right, a self-help book with a twist.

“I don’t believe in rules, or x plus x equals this or that every woman will have the same outcome if they follow the same steps because we’re all different,” she said. “I wanted to create book, first and foremost, as a platform for women to have their voices and stories heard.”

The author, from South East London, explained: “Mr Wrong is a collection of stories written by women from all across the world who seem to keep encountering the same sort of man – men who are unavailable. You know the ones, the guy with multiple names, multiple girlfriends, past baggage, the ones who will time and time again, avoid commitment! [The book] aims to dispel myths about relationships created by society and ones we place on ourselves.”

In fact, Blechner used her own “disastrous” experience in a previous relationship to inspire the book, her first foray into publishing.

“In the past, I wouldn’t speak about the things that went wrong in my relationships, I felt ashamed and worried what friends would think. I buried it all, but I found that once I started to share my story with people, it was actually quite healing.”

After getting her head around blogging and sharing some of her experiences on the popular online platform, the 35-year-old found there was a market for people who had experienced similar pain in their quest for Mr Right.

“A lot of Americans started gravitating towards the blog and started telling their stories, so I put an appeal out asking for women to contact me and share their Mr Wrong stories and I was inundated with stories from America, Canada, UK, Australia and it just kind of happened from there.”

She noticed that from many of the submissions that “most women were entering relationships to complete something within themselves rather than going in as a whole person and loving themselves.”

“Quite often, these women came into relationships expecting the other person to fix them,” she said.

“Another one was repeating past issues. There were quite a lot of women who had an absent father, which is a whole book in itself; those who have a fear of abandonment and look to men to fix their fear, but what they don’t realise that you’ll get men who will go off and abandon you until that situation has been completely healed.”

Though Blechner is quick to point out that she is not a qualified counsellor or relationship coach (in fact, she’s an English tutor by day), she is passionate about empowering and providing support for women.

“Like I said, I just wanted to give women a platform to speak about their stories. This book is not about me telling people what to do,” she clarified.

“The first thing I want to establish is that Mr Wrong is not a how-to book. I am not a dating expert and I am not interested in telling women how to date and how to have a relationship because I believe there are an abundance of books, of which I have read.”

In that sense, Blechner says she thinks fairytales have a lot to answer for.

“There are a lot of women growing up who are indoctrinated by that stuff,” she said. “There’s a sense of ‘you are a princess, but you’re nobody until Mr Right finds you to come and sweep you off your feet and make you a complete person’.”

She then draws reference to a story shared by a male contributor in Mr Wrong whose relationship ended because his partner was hoping he had the key to her completion.

“He says it’s attractive when a woman knows her worth and that really stuck with me. I don’t think I expected that. When you know your worth, you resonate with men who are attracted to that. When you don’t, I think you can let anything in.”

It was a two-year journey getting Mr Wrong to its final destination, which came with numerous rejection letters, self-publishing hurdles and navigating a competitive industry she had no prior experience in. But, she says, it added more character to the sojourn.

“Rejection letters came in and after three or four months it started to get to me, but someone close to me said, ‘Think about [Harry Potter] author JK Rowling and how many rejection letters she had. Don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do it.’ That ultimately sent me on the path of discovering the world of self-publishing. It hasn’t been easy, but it has been worth it.”

She added: “From the age of four, I would say, ‘I’m going to be a writer, but I’ll do it later in life’. [I would say], ‘I want to save the world, save dogs, save everything and then I’ll write a book.’ But I left the animals and saving the world, it’s too hard. I found my calling in writing.

The Mr Wrong Book Tour kicks off on Feb 12 at Hounslow Library and continues at Brixton Library on Feb 13 and Croydon Waterstones on Feb 14. For more details, visit: http://tinyurl.com/qbgh7af

Want a copy of Mr Wrong? Click below:

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Mr Wrong Book Tour is Here!

The Mr Wrong Book Tour is here!

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Come and join host Lillian Ogbogoh and author Danni Blechner in a lively debate on Love and Relationships and listen to real life relationship stories from men and women.

“I wrote this book not to preach, teach or tell women how to “date” but to unite us through our stories, inspire us to let go of baggage and empower us by breaking free from negative belief systems and discovering our True Selves.”- a note from the author

This is event is in support of Women’s Aid providing safety for women and children survivors of domestic abuse.

**Click on your chosen link to confirm your attendance.**

You MUST select the event you wish to attend and REGISTER at Eventbrite.

12th Feb, 6pm-7.30pm HOUNSLOW LIBRARY
http://tinyurl.com/qbgh7af

13TH Feb 7pm-9pm BRIXTON LIBRARY £3 (FREE glass of wine on entry. DJ James Wilkins spinning tunes.
http://tinyurl.com/pmerjah

14th Feb 12pm- 2pm WATERSTONES CROYDON
http://tinyurl.com/khw4bf3 

More on Mr Wrong..

MR WRONG COVER 650Do you ever feel that you will never meet the right man? Do your relationships suddenly come to an end leaving you in a wake of dust wondering what just happened or what you could have possibly done to deserve such a swift exit? Do you attract the same type of man repeating the same negative patterns and situations that leave you  thinking, “Here We Go Again?” or “I’ve been here before?” Are you dating men who love you and leave you leaving you emotionally wounded and insecure, wondering why you didn’t cut the mustard? Well, ladies, I have news for you. You do! You are simply dating the wrong man.

My name is Daniella Blechner and I am the author of a book called Mr Wrongwritten after a decade of bad luck with the opposite sex. I no longer make a secret of it and claim it to empower others. Faced with a string of dating disasters, I had no choice but to look within. On my quest to find out what Love really is, I realised that our inner world reflects our outer world and we must Love ourselves before we can truly Love another. I went on a quest to interview women and men around the world and documented their relationship stories.

Mr Wrong is a collection of both humorous and poignant stories written by women who have encountered and overcome the infamous ‘Mr Wrong,’ stories that celebrate men who are getting it right as well as stories from men themselves. From Ex-Mr Wrongs to Men struggling to survive in their “Knight in Shining Armour role” the book reveals men’s innermost secrets, thoughts and feelings on relationships and women. What role do women play in creating so called Mr Wrongs? Mr Wrong allows the reader to question, examine and challenge negative belief systems that block us from having successful relationships with others as well as ourselves. Through interactive exercises, meditations and questionnaires this book is designed to allow the reader to embark on a journey of self-discovery.

7 Shades of Love is here!

7 Shades of LoveI am proud to say that my poetry anthology 7 Shades of Love is officially here.

As a Spiritual Woman who believes in the Power of Positive Affirmation and Meditation, 7 Shades of Love was borne as an exploration of what exactly Love means. What is it to Love someone purely, unconditionally without demand or selfishness or a desire to change? What is it to truly accept someone for who they Are and Love them regardless of imperfection? How can we achieve this type of Love in a physical world where much of our happiness is dependent on expectation and need? Is it even possible??

It was then I realised that Love truly is a discovery of Self. The more we Love and Accept and Value Ourselves without Judgement or a desire to change, to accept just as we are, the more we can Love and Accept others- not just as “others” but of reflections of ourselves. A Unified Body. A Unified Self. As 14 year old Nikesh, when asked impromptu (in an English Romeo and Juliet lesson I was teaching at the time) what Love was he answered back unfazed and without hesitation, “Loving an Imperfect person perfectly.”  It was then that I realised that Love far transcends the concept of loving another because… or loving another when… but what it really meant was that Love means loving and valuing OURSELVES as imperfect people, recognising our value and worth and so seeing this in others. To see ourselves as wondrous beings that have been perfectly made flaws and all. For how can we expect others to Love us without this Love and Acceptance from and of Ourselves?

We spend so much time judging others when we forget to look within. We spend so much time expecting others to fulfill our needs and looking for a God that exists outside of ourselves when everything we truly need resides inside us all along. It was then I realised that my journey or quest to discover what True Love was, was it is something that could not be measured, qualified or even summarised in words but was something that had to be felt and experienced. There are many different types of Love ranging from parental love, to spousal love, to codependent love, passionate love, sexual love, addictive love, unhealthy love and 7 Shades of Love, through an eclectic mix of poets from all across the world, have written about it all.

7 Shades of Love explores these types of Love, along with unconditional True Love through colour and their associated Western and Eastern meanings. Alongside these poems are Positive Affirmations to help us rooted, balanced and in remembrance of what Love truly is in this complicated world.

Thank you to every single poet who made the publication of this book possible. I have loved putting this together and have learnt so much. 7 Shades of Love is available via my website (you can buy a SIGNED copy) at www.daniellablechner.com and Amazon

Blurb

Author Daniella Blechner takes a unique approach to the ways in which various people, all poets, have dealt with love. Psychologists classify love as an emotion, others deem it the highest of all universal frequencies. In a somewhat surprising correlation between the vital chakras of the human body and the ways in which we connect to and separate ourselves from love, Blechner illuminates how our energetic frequencies can influence our approach to love by a simple shift in balance. She’s combined this with modern psychology and added the artistic writings of people from around the world in haiku, rhyme, and free verse. 7 Shades of Love is a comforting read that will help you connect to the people in your world through a better understanding of yourself, letting you attract the relationships you want and assuring you that you’re grounded in the universe.

Check out contributor poet Nicole Moore’s Review here

MR WRONG OFFICAL BOOK COVER REVEALED!

It is with great excitement, I present to you the official Mr Wrong book cover. Get ready for a Sept/October launch. Please sign up to newsletter to get updates about progress of book and exciting events. Cover is designed by the amazing Sunny Tellone http://www.sunnytellone.com

Much love and gratitude towards anyone who have shown me support on this journey.

Daniella xx

 

MrWrong Back and Front

 

Blurb

Do you ever feel as though you will never meet the right man? Are your relationships leaving you wondering what you’re doing wrong? Do you attract the same type of man, repeating the same negative patterns over and over again? If you find yourself thinking “Here we go again” or “I’ve been here before”, if you’re dating men who love you and leave you emotionally wounded and insecure, or if you’re wondering why you just can’t seem to get it right, I have news for you. You are simply dating the wrong men.

 

Mr. Wrong is an insightful and witty exploration into why some women continually attract the wrong men. This powerful collection of humorous, insightful, and entertaining stories are written by women from across the world that have encountered and overcome toxic Mr. Wrong relationships.

 

Mr. Wrong gives women the courage to turn their pain into Power and their adversities into Opportunities. It also gives space for celebrating Mr. Right by acknowledging men’s valuable relationship stories too. Do men get a bad rap? What role do women play in creating Mr. Wrong? Are we victims of our past, social conditioning or are we simply re-enacting negative belief systems? Open up and learn from Mr. Wrong and Claim Mr. Right by making a change from within.

Would You Like a Dedication in the Mr Wrong Book?

Would you like a dedication in Mr Wrong? Would you like an excerpt, poem or free book or even a special feature on my blog? Then please donate to the Mr Wrong Crowd Fund appeal. My challenge is to raise £1000 in 18 days. So far I have £405…. The costs will go towards: *publishing costs £199 initial , *distribution, *editing,*proofreading *book cover design *author page *book review *marketing plan.
As most of you know, I set up this blog nearly two years ago with the view to write a book called Mr Wrong. I am proud to say that that book is now finally complete and it is finally time to give birth to something that is designed to unite, inspire and empower. Please see my campaign below. Let’s make it happen!
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Short Summary

My name is Daniella Blechner and after two years, have finally completed writing  a book called Mr Wrong (73’000 words.) Mr Wrong comes after a decade of bad luck with the opposite sex. I no longer make a secret of it and claim it to empower others. Mr Wrong is a  collection of stories and experiences written by women who have encountered Mr Wrong. The aim of the book is to empower, inspire and unite women by sharing our stories. It’s time to stop blaming and berating ourselves by getting  rid of Mr Wrong and claiming Mr Right! Men also have their say in the book, allowing the book to explore a balanced view of the role both men and women have in relationships. Are men given a bad rap? What role do women play?

The book is a self-help relationship book that allows the reader to interact through exercise, quizzes and meditations. It questions belief systems, explores the Power of Forgiveness and the importance of Loving, Blessing and Letting Go of old baggage. It is a book of journeying and self discovering.

As someone, who has experienced Mr Wrong a few times now, this book is close to my heart. . I want to share what I have learnt and give the opportunity for women and men all over the world to share their experiences too. The book and the stories it contains will make you laugh, make you cry and above all think. By contributing to the publishing of this book, you will be part of allowing hundreds or even thousands of potential readers to have access to these deeply personal and inspiring stories of empowerment, self discovery and change. This in turn, will allow them insight  into how to create positive changes and attract healthy relationships into their own lives. We are stronger than we think!

THE IMPACT: Mr Wrong takes both women and men on a journey of self-discovery allowing them to question their roles within relationships. Through exercises and affirmations it allows the reader to acknowledge any negative belief systems and prepare themselves for a more positive path ahead. Please read an excerpt here: Chapter 12: Start With You. https://dingdongitsmrwrong.wordpress.com/2013/08/22/chapter-2-start-with-you-2/

What We Need & What You Get

I will need £1000 to publish the book. I have selected a self publishing company that has already agreed to contribute some of the money as they can see the potential of the book. The £1000 will go towards:

*Cover design

*Editing

*Proof reading

*PR and Marketing plan

* Distribution

* Publication and proof copy

PERKS!

All contributors will receive a free excerpt from the book plus a poem. Contributors who contribute £15+ will recieve a free copy of the book Mr Wrong and a dedication in the book. £25+ A free copy of Mr Wrong and a free copy of poetry anthology book 7 Shades of Love £50+ TWO copies of Mr Wrong . All of the above and an opportunity to feature on my blog dingdongitsmrwrong.wordpress.com promoting their business

Other Ways You Can Help

I understand that not everybody will be able to contribute financially. If this project appeals to you and you can see the benefit of such a book, please know that you can play a part in spreading the word about the book and this funding scheme.  You can:

Follow my Blog https://dingdongitsmrwrong.wordpress.com/about/ and share with others.

“Like” the Mr Wrong FaceBook page and share posts https://www.facebook.com/dingdongitsmrwrong?ref=hl

Follow me on twitter and tweet about the fund https://twitter.com/dingdongmrwrong

Blog about the Mr Wrong appeal and share this page with others.

I thank you in advance for you kind help and support in this project. All support and donations no matter how large or small are greatly appreciated.

CLICK ON THE LINK TO DONATE AND CLAIM YOUR PERK:

Daniella Blechner- author of Mr Wrong

  Daniella Blechner- author of Mr Wrong